Some graduation related tears...

Hello friends, and welcome back! I'm a little bit emotional this week, and I just need to chat about life in general, so let's settle in for a cup of coffee!

This past Tuesday was Henry's 8th grade graduation from the K-8 Catholic school he's been at since 1st grade (that's quite a trip down memory lane, that link I just posted. I'm going to try not to cry again 😭). I took it HARD. This was surprising even to me: "Tiffany. It's 8th grade. It's not even a real graduation! Get a grip!" But there it is. I had a very difficult time with it.

I went to public school. The longest I was ever at any school was 6 years from kindergarten through 6th grade, and I don't have particularly fond memories from any of the three schools I attended before college. But my kids' school...it's different. It's a family. Everybody knows your name there. Everybody cares. Many of the people working there, as well as parents of other kids, are alumni of the school. The class sizes are small, and a warm and fuzzy sense pervades. A few pertinent anecdotes:

A beloved kindergarten teacher passed away two years ago, after teaching at this school for *37 years*. The Pre-k and kindergarten wing of the school is now named for her, because she was such a fixture there, teaching kindergarten to multiple generations of families. The school was emotionally gutted when she died.

Henry's 8th grade class held a tribute to the Pre-k 4 teacher, who came to the school the year that this particular class started Pre-k. Now those 4 year olds are leaving and going to high school. There wasn't a dry eye in the house for that one.

I never had a school experience like this. And Henry has been there for 8 years. He started there when I was pregnant with Anne, and I had prayed a novena for Mike to be won over to this school, to provide the impetus to move him from where he was to somewhere we'd have to pay tuition for him to attend. And he was. And it was one of the best decisions we ever made.

This school is a place of comfort and solace to me. It's warm and welcoming, and it's a community filled with faith. Anne will still be there for 6 more years, and the alumni certainly seem to keep up with the school, so I'm certain that it will always be in our lives. But my Henry, my first child, my guinea pig, the one I fretted over whenever we had to make a big change like this one due to his shyness and sweet nature, the one who spearheaded our foray into Catholic education...he won't be there anymore. My kids headed off to school, together, for the very last time. When I drive by the building every day on my way to work, and pray a Hail Mary for each of them, he won't be inside anymore. He's headed to a Catholic boys high school that he is SO EXCITED about, and I know that he will be in excellent hands there, but I keep coming back to something that repeatedly makes me cry:

It's the end of an era.

Anne owns a soft spot in my heart because she is my baby, but Henry owns an equally large soft spot because he is my first child, my beloved little boy who changed my life forever when he was born. Now he's heading off to something much larger and in some ways scarier, and certainly something that we have not experienced before with our kids: high school. He's becoming a young man, and while it's exciting to see, I'm also dreading all of these changes and all of the new worries that come along with them. I'm trying very hard, but I've been crying every single day. And my anxiety has been flaring up quite badly. But I keep trying.

Henry has some basketball goings on this summer at his new school, and he's also starting a work study program there to help fund his tuition. He'll ease in, to be sure, and they have an entire freshman welcome program designed to aid the kids in the transition. Most of the boys from his 8th grade class are also attending there, so he will see some familiar faces. And that's a good situation, because they're all really good kids. But it's going to be a BIG change.

I'm trying to hang in there over here, I promise. Mike hasn't started summer term teaching yet, so he's been home in the mornings after the kids go to school, and we've been talking a lot. About all of this and how we're struggling to handle it, each in our own way. It helps to have someone to talk to about it. My crafting has been a happy distraction, as has my dancing. I'll be posting about each of those in the coming weeks.

In the meantime, I'm going to keep slogging on and hope that these emotional reactions to every little thing abate. I suppose it's part of the parenting journey, but it sure is cramping my style. :-0

I hope the rest of you are having a good week. I appreciate all virtual hugs and prayers! I guess I'm a little needy right now. 🤗

In celebration of Catholic Schools Week...

Yes, I forced him to pose for this picture ;-)

Morning all, and happy Tuesday! It's Catholic Schools Week here in my diocese, as I think it is nationwide, so I thought I'd put together a quick highlight post of some of my previous missives on this subject.

This is an interesting topic to me because I've dipped my toe into both the public and private spheres. I'm a product of public school. I had a great experience in elementary school, but the junior and high schools I attended were a bit rough. When I had Henry, my assumption was that we would send him to public school as well, and we live in a district with very nice schools. While he was in kindergarten, I started thinking about Catholic school for the first time, and I wrote about how that came about back in January 2011 (when I was pregnant with Anne, awww!) And then we attended some of the affiliated open houses (part 1 and part 2), and we just fell in love with his current Catholic school. While I was looking for these posts, I came across this one about both registering Henry at the school and calling my parish to schedule Anne's baptism. It's rather amusing. :0

And I've been happy with our decision ever since. It's a sacrifice, because we have to budget for it, but to see how he's thriving there, and the adorable things he brings home from the religion curriculum, it's all worth it. I know that everyone has different options available to them, and what is right for your family could be completely different from mine, this is simply my experience.

Did you go to Catholic school, or do your kids? Do leave a comment. And tomorrow hurry back for the Catholic Book Club, we'll be discussing Mother Teresa: Come Be My Light!

Adventures in tour guiding...

So, yesterday was my big day of finally volunteering at Henry's school to help out at the open house. I've been wanting to do this for years, but never had worked up the initiative. Anything that requires me to socialize with people I don't see all that often is something that makes my introverted personality want to run and hide. But our experience at the open house when we were looking to switch Henry to Catholic school was SO positive, and we have liked the school so much, that I wanted to give back a bit. The open house is a part of a larger "Catholic Schools Week," wherein Catholic education is promoted in the media, and fun activities are planned for the kids. It's a lovely thing to be a part of.

A form was sent home that you could write your name on if you wanted to volunteer for the open house. It helped that it was so easy, because I don't remember this form going home in the past. I just wrote my name down, and tucked the form into Henry's backpack. I figured I could be put to good use handing out brochures or welcoming people into the school. Pointing the way to the juice and cookies, perhaps.

Sunday morning dawns, and I dressed cutely and professionally, wanting to make a positive impression for the school. I head out, arriving a few minutes early, like a good eager beaver should. I look around for a few minutes, trying to find the room where the volunteers are slated to meet up. The problem, you see, is that I don't know my way around the school terribly well. I'm not involved in the Home School Association, and any other time I'm at the school for events Henry is a part of or for teacher conferences, I have Henry or Mike to guide me.

I see a few other people and tag along behind them. One of the women is clearly In Charge.

"Tour guides? Yes, right in here."

Uh oh.

Obviously, there must be another room where all of the NON-tour guides will go. The people who are fairly clueless and want to point to the cookies. I mill around for a bit, doing what I do best: listening in.

I discover nothing. Nobody else looks concerned about this turn of events. The form said nothing about volunteering to be a tour guide specifically. It just said, "if you'd like to volunteer for the open house, please sign this form and return it with your child." But there doesn't appear to be any other volunteer opportunities available. I wondered if everyone else knew about this tour guide thing. I casually sidle up to a lady who looks nice:

"Have you volunteered at the open house before?"

"No." Her eyes widen. Clearly, a kindred spirit.

"I don't know my way around very well, so I didn't realize they only needed tour guides..."

"Oh my gosh, ME NEITHER!"

I love this lady.

We talk for a bit, and I recognize a few mothers of children in Henry's class. Some clearly are part of the HSA and are "in the know." The others move over to our group.

"You know, I don't know my way around very well, I'm a little nervous about being a tour guide..."

Whew! It's not just me. However, we're all in a bit of a predicament. There are "tour guide information" announcements being made, and I'm feeling my palms sweat. Clearly, the people in charge need and expect us to be tour guides. I finally get an opportunity to corner the head lady:

"Do you need people to do other things besides being a tour guide? I don't know my way around the building very well."

"Well, no."

At least she's honest.

"Don't worry. Every parent is paired with a middle school student who has received formal training. The kids will do everything in terms of leading the way. We are in desperate need of adults to be a part of the tours. All you need to do is talk to the parents."

Well, she did phrase it in such a way that made me *somewhat* less anxious.  And sort of like I couldn't say no. So I obsessively read the sheet they had given us, wiping my damp palms on my pants. Keeping it classy.

Next thing you knew, I was placed with an 8th grader named Cassie and we were herded off to greet a set of parents with their 3rd grader in tow. The husband works for the diocese. Fabulous. No pressure there.

But honestly, it went very well. Their son is currently enrolled in public school (the same one Henry went to for kindergarten, so nice conversation fodder there) and would be going into 4th grade in the fall, also the same as Henry. I could tell that they definitely wanted to make the switch to Catholic school, it was just a matter of whether it would be this one or one other. The other one we considered for Henry, actually. Cassie led the way, and I made introductions, answered their questions, and inserted my experience as best I could.

They spent a lot of time at the school, so I'm hoping that they will enroll their son, we will see. I actually didn't have time to give another tour, since I was with them for the majority of the 2 hour open house. There was a HUGE turnout, with 10 local Catholic schools closing and parents scrambling to find new schools for their kids.

Thus, overall I had a very nice time. The initial anxiety notwithstanding, I'm so, so glad that I did this and really enjoyed participating. Since we toured the 4th grade room, I got a sneak peek at Henry's next room and teacher, which was a huge bonus. Everything just reinforced why we chose this school for Henry - I fell in love with the warmth, the sense of family and community, the Catholic statuary and prayers in every classroom. Another good open house experience.

Is it Catholic Schools Week in your diocese as well? Are you thinking about Catholic education? Leave me a comment!

Catholic school tour, part ii

Last night we trooped over to St. B's for their open house, and happily, Mike's class was cancelled and he could accompany us. It was an interesting evening. Well, the school tour was. The "poo event" we experienced later with Hank was not, but hey. You can't win 'em all.

As soon as we pulled up I noticed something: this school was MUCH larger than St. A's. In terms of the facility size and the student body, it's about twice as large. We barely got a parking spot, even just as the open house was beginning, and headed in.

Right away, my impression was made. I thought to myself, "Oh, Mike will hate this." :) It was a very nice school, don't get me wrong. But it was very "rah rah," a little bit in your face. Motivational sayings about reaching your full potential were hanging from the ceiling, and everywhere touted the fact that this school has received designations from the state as being a "school of excellence." They really sold that point.

We got a tour guide, which was a good thing, since I think we would have gotten lost otherwise. The facilities were very nice, more modern than St. A's, but it didn't feel as warm or homey. The school did seem to have a strong Catholic identity. Each classroom had an icon of a patron saint posted, and school Masses are held at least twice a month. They offer a few more classes than St. A's, such as both French and Spanish (St. A's has only Spanish), drama and dance. And their hot lunches seemed a tad nicer while being less expensive. The tuition is about $100 or so cheaper per year than St. A's. But honestly, over the course of a year, that's pretty minimal. Anything within a $300 range annually is not a deal breaker.

When we left, I quickly gathered Mike and Hank's opinions. It was unanimous: we all like St. A's better by a mile. The vibe at St. B's, while still filled with nice people, just wasn't as warm and familial. Mike even admitted to liking St. A's from the moment we entered the school. Here, we all had the opposite reaction.

Sooo.... next week I'm going to call St. A's to inquire about how many spaces they have in first grade for the fall and see what information we'd have to bring should we register Hank. They only require $60 at registration, another point in their favor (rather than $150 at St. B's). The following week, we'll then make a decision and if we go that route (which it seems like we will at this point) I'll register Hank that week, well before the end of February. I couldn't be more thrilled. :)

Catholic school open house bonanza, and nesting abounds...

Well. :) This was a very interesting weekend, and as always, I shall provide all the details. :)

I did in fact do a spell of nesting on Saturday. I went though the changing table/dresser combo that currently still lives in Hank's room. I had cleaned it out before, so it wasn't too bad. This means I now have to locate the bag in our storage marked "newborn" but I'll deal with that another week. I got all of Hank's stuff fit nicely into his larger dresser unit, and the changing table piece ready for the move to the nursery whenever the nursery actually exists. I consider this a success.

Sunday I was a bit nervous, since I had to teach Children's Liturgy of the Word. Last time it had gone well, so I was hopeful. Alas, this time was another one of those weeks. I had a larger group that included several young children circa age 3, and it was impossible to keep them still and quiet, thus distracting the entire group. I did the best I could, and it certainly didn't go terribly, but it wasn't a stellar installment either.

After Mass, we stopped for a brief lunch break, and then it was time for Catholic school open house #1. I was nervous, because I know that I'm certainly biased in favor of sending Hank to Catholic school in the fall, and that Mike is biased in favor of keeping him in public school since we live in a great district and pay the taxes to show for it. I was praying, so I was resigned to whatever outcome might come our way. We packed into the car and drove 2 minutes to contender #1, St. A's.

Immediately upon arrival, we were greeted warmly. People lined the hallway, saying "Welcome to St. A's!" It could have been creepy, but it wasn't. :) It was just such a pleasant change from our public school orientation last May. Right away, we were directed to the principal, who has a reputation as being "not a warm and fuzzy." I was worried that this would bother me, but honestly, it didn't. She was just fine. Certainly not the warmest person I've ever met, but not unkind or objectionable. She greeted us nicely and even spoke to Hank for a minute. After that, we were given a gift bag with some informational sheets and directed to a parent volunteer to give us a tour of the school.

There commenced the most thorough tour I've ever been on. :) We were there for nearly 2 hours! We visited every classroom, grades pre-k through 8, including all of the "specials": art, music, gym, computers, and the library. Every single teacher was kind and genuine. I was getting warm and fuzzies all over the place. The first grade teacher in particular was raved about amongst the others, and I noticed that she was wearing a small brown scapular around her neck. Every classroom had a crucifix on the wall and a saint statute in one corner. Statements of Christian values were posted in each room.

Instead of state testing and wellness policies, this school emphasizes traditional Catholic values and service, strong academics, particularly math, and the sense of family that they like to pervade their school, with an encouragement of children having fun at school in additon to learning. They have a monthly school Mass (it would be nice if it were more frequent, but I can live with this) in addition to Masses celebrating holy days and other feasts, full sacramental preparation for first reconciliation and eucharist, altar server training, service requirements for all students, daily prayer, and adorable little extras, like the first grade Christmas pageant.

The children all wear school uniforms, of which I highly approve, and the school has a strong code of conduct without being "over the top," which is how I perceived the public school. The tuition is extremely reasonable, and since we attend at a parish without a Catholic school, we qualify for their parishoner rate. We can afford it.

After we left, Hank announced, "I love this school, Mommy. I want to go here!" I did my best to stay quiet until Mike spoke first. He said, "let's talk when we get home," which I knew was a good sign. :)

Following a trip to the grocery store, Mike and I sat down. He said that going in he wasn't prepared to make a change, because he thinks our public elementary school is a good one, which it is. But that he was very impressed by St. A's, and thinks that it might be a better fit. He's leaning toward trying it for first grade. I was estactic.

The decision isn't final yet. I think we should let it simmer for a few weeks. There is still another open house that I'd like to go to. St. B's, which is Thursday evening. Mike can't attend that one with us due to a class commitment, but Hank and I will scope it out. I think it's always good to compare.

But in the end, I'm hoping to have Hank registered for Catholic school, most likely St. A's, by the end of February, to begin in the fall. With the 3 of us having as positive an impression as we did, my thought at this juncture is that this is a winner.

Last night, I couldn't sleep, my mind was such awhirl by the unexpected developments of the day. Even though the tuition is affordable for us, we still have after care costs to consider (school starts nice and early, 7:45 am, but ends at 2 pm), plus the new baby. If Mike is home, these costs won't exist, but eventually we'd like him to find a job in his new field, obviously. I will go back to work, so we'll have daycare costs, which for an infant, are *significant*. Catholic schools also come with fundraising obligations, and I'm worried about those too. But once again, I shouldn't "borrow worry." One thing at a time. Hank and I will attend this other open house on Thursday, we'll let a week or so of thinking time go by, and we'll make a decision. And then we'll go from there.

But overall, I'm feeling much, much better about schooling issues. And despite all the uncertainty with Mike's future employment, I know we're in good hands. Everything is going to be ok.

New 54 Day Rosary Novena, and Catholic school next year?

Yesterday, I finished up my very first 54 day rosary novena. It was for an intention very dear to my heart. Today in my Conversations with God meditation, the reading mentions the parable of the sower, and how we should plant seeds, but it is only God that can make that seed grow. We must practice patience and humility over time, because one never knows what that seed is doing at any given point, but we can trust that God is always there working and we should leave it up to Him. It was just so fitting, and really put me at peace this morning.

Today, I'm beginning a brand new novena. My intention this time is two-fold: I'm praying for Mike to find a good job in his new field, in this area (we have no intentions on moving; our family is here, I have a good job here, and we love the area) after he graduates in May, and for discernment regarding where Hank should attend school in the fall. Just as a brief rehash, Hank is currently attending the very reputable public elementary school in our neighborhood as a kindergartener.

My concerns are kind of wide-ranging. He's receiving an excellent education, no doubt about that, and I truly don't feel like he's experiencing any sort of negative influence. Overall, I just feel like I'd like him to have a Catholic education if we're able to afford it. I like the idea of our faith being integrated into his daily studies. As well, my worry isn't the elementary school, but the middle school, even though that's 6 years off. I haven't necessarily heard anything terrible about our public middle school, but I remember my public middle school, and boy do I wish I didn't. That's a tough age, and I would feel much more comfortable with him in a Catholic school with the same kids he's been going with for the previous 5 years. And I'd rather make the switch now, while he's little, rather than in sixth grade when he already is attached to a group of friends.

Interesting, I went to public school K-12, in a city school district even. My elementary school was great, but middle school and high school were rough. In middle school, I was so miserable, that my parents offered to send me to our parish's Catholic school, but by that point I was in seventh grade and quite shy, and I was afraid to move to a totally new place where I knew nobody.

Hank also is on the shy side, and I just think the best time to make a change, if we make one, is next year. And excitingly, Catholic Schools Week begins this Sunday in this area, and with it, a host of open houses. There are 3 Catholic schools in our district. I'd like to stick within our district, since they do provide the extra services, such as speech and fine motor skills (both of which Hank is receiving at his public school) in the Catholic schools as well, and I do have a high opinion of our district.

Out of the three, I have my eye on two of them. Both serve children in grades PreK-8. School A is the closest one to our house. When I mentioned Catholic school to Mike, he said that if we did decide to do that, this is the one he'd prefer since it's so close. Hank's current elementary school is even closer, and it's just so convenient, so location is a consideration. We know quite a few people that send their kids to this school. All have good things to say about it. I have heard a few comments about the principal being a bit "cold" and unapproachable, which could potentially bother me, but we'll see. The school seems to have a solid Catholic identity, holds monthly school Masses and trains all the children to be altar servers. Their open house is this Sunday afternoon.

School B is slightly farther from our house, but by "slightly" I mean that it's still well within 5 miles. It's really no big deal, it's just not right down the street. It has an outstanding academic reputation and has even been awarded a distinction by our state. I don't know anyone that sends their kids there, so no personal anecdotes like with School A. However, their web site just has a very serene feeling to it. I can't totally explain, but I have a really good feeling about this school based on my reading of their curriculum and faith activities. It just seems prayerful to me. Their open house is next Thursday evening.

We're going to go to both of them and see what we think. I decided not to pursue the third school. I think if we're going to make the leap, we have two other good choices, so need to complicate the decision further. We'll see how it goes, and I'll report in fully. :)