Life is good when you are awash in delightful Tweetups

Hi all! I had a JAM PACKED weekend, filled with the funnest of activities, and I've been anxious to fill you all in! Let's settle in with our beverages.

The weekend began with a Twitter meetup, but we also had a dance performance in there and a Father's Day with that was busy enough to exhaust the children for the duration of the summer. ;-) Soooo, what I think I'll do is talk about my SUPER FANTASTIC Tweetup on Saturday afternoon, then save the dance hafla for either a separate post or episode of Tea Time. What do you think? Do you prefer the dance frivolity in post form or podcast? I want your input, so do write in.

All right, so the Tweetup! You all know how much I love and value our Catholic community on Twitter. I find it incredibly supportive and soothing. And through the years, I have had the privilege of meeting some of my Twitter friends in real life. It's not as often as I like, but when it happens it really packs a punch.

Some years ago, I became Twitter friends with a very nice fellow named Mike Gannon. We shared other common Twitter friends, as well as a Catholic podcast we both loved called This Catholic Life. I knew that Mike was potentially interested in the religious life, and had a deep love of the Carmelites, so it wasn't a huge surprise in the fall of 2014 when he joined a community of Carmelite brothers as a Postulant. We missed him quite a bit when he was off of social media for the duration of his postulancy, but he happily has been back since he became a Novice.

Several months back, Mike (who is now Brother Joseph!) let me know that he'd be in my area visiting some family during his vacation time. Naturally, I leapt at the chance to meet him in person!

And so Saturday afternoon, Henry and I traveled to a local Mexican restaurant to meet up with Brother Joseph. Mike (my husband that is, this is terribly confusing with all these Mikes, isn't it?!) offered to entertain the kids elsewhere so that I could eat lunch uninterrupted, and let's face it, that's a TEMPTING offer. You mean, I can eat lunch without someone crawling around under the table in search of lost crayons, and Anne telling Henry to "STOP IT!!!!" on constant repeat for 60 straight minutes?

What I ended up doing was having Mike take Anne for a Daddy/daughter date, and I brought Henry with me solo. I figured: when else am I going to get a free, up close and personal, advertisement for the religious life? So I asked Henry if he wanted to come, and he asked what kind of food the restaurant served. That shows you where Henry's mind is at in terms of this process, but no matter. He wanted to come, and that was good enough for me.

So we arrive. We peer into all of the other cars in the parking lot as we circle, trying to be discreet. Henry offered to go and physically look into the window of one intriguing-looking contender, but I told him that we were trying to be clandestine. :0 We headed into the restaurant and texted Brother Joseph. Two minutes later:

ALL the excitement!! How cool do you feel when your friends wear habits?!?!

I think that anytime you meet someone in real life whom you have only ever communicated with on social media, you're curious as to what they will be like. Will they be exactly as you picture in your mind? Or will they be completely different?

Brother Joseph was exactly as I pictured. :) We had a lovely, easily flowing conversation, and enjoyed good Mexican food and beer. We talked about religious life like there was no tomorrow, and Henry asked some thoughtful and interesting questions.

Granted, sometime after Henry had scarfed down his entire quesadilla, plus chips, plus a churro for dessert, he grew bored. I suppose there is only so much in-depth talk of Carmelite spirituality a 10 year old can take. ;-)

It was smashing. Anew, I felt intense gratitude for the gift of friendships that God has given me. Some of our Twitter friends I may never meet in this life, yet I know that if I ask for their prayers they will give them to me in a heartbeat, and that if I need some levity in my day all I have to do is log on and check my timeline.

Glorious, I tell you, glorious! It is such a rush to meet social media friends in person for the first time. And we may get another opportunity next fall! Craft beer will be involved, for sure and for certain.

If you're ever in Western New York, you MUST let me know. I will be hurt and offended if you do not. :0

Catholic Book Club: Dominican Life

Happy Wednesday everyone! Today is our official Catholic Book Club installment for September, which is Dominican Life, by Fr. Walter Wagner, OP. You all know that I am a Third Order Dominican, so this is a topic near and dear to my heart. Go get your tea, let's get started!

*procures hot water*

This book is actually a compilation of retreat talks that Fr. Wagner gave to a community of Dominican nuns in Summit, New Jersey. The nuns transcribed and edited his presentations, aiming to retain Father's conversational style with only minor edits for readability. Each talk is its own chapter, and begins with a quote from the Rule of St. Augustine, which is what St. Dominic chose as the guiding precept for his order. Following that, Fr. Wagner expounds upon the selection, discussion the content a bit before moving on to its applicability to Dominican life. It's a very interesting and encompassing Table of Contents (you can see the full sample via the "Look Inside!" feature on Amazon), and therefore I think worth including here:

The Purpose of the Rule
The Rule as the "Other"
To Be Rich
The Sharing of Wealth
The "Special" Religious
Dominican Liturgy
Abstinence in Religious Life
The Contemplative Gaze
Work in Religious Life
The Dominican Habit
Dominican Chastity
Dominican Correction
Dominican Identity
Dominican Bodiliness
Dominican Dysfunction
Dominican Authority
Dominican Freedom

As a Dominican, I found this to be fulfilling spiritual reading. The chapters aren't lengthy (the total print book length is 222 pages, so not a heavy lift in terms of size), which I see as a positive thing. Ideal for a short bit of contemplation each evening before bed. Fr. Wager indeed has an engaging and personal style that comes across nicely in the text.

The thing that I *didn't* love about this book is that I personally find it jarring to read something that feels more like a speech rather than a book. It does indeed read like a transcript. There is still good content there, but I found it a bit distracting. The other thing is that although a layperson can certainly glean lots of good wisdom in these pages (as I in fact did), it does feel like content that was aimed at a target audience of religious. Not everything in the book applies to laypeople. So, that too left me wanting a bit more.

I think that the best way for laypeople to get the most out of this book would be to read it in very short increments, perhaps even less than a single chapter at a time, to really reflect on the material and how it could apply to to a lay lifestyle. As well, the material that is more clearly relevant to the nuns is simply very interesting information for laypeople, an inside glimpse into life within a Dominican monastery.

As a Kindle download, this is only $7.99 and I do think it is a worthy addition to ones queue of spiritual reading, taking the things I mentioned above into consideration. For Dominicans, it really is an essential read, I think. Has anyone else read this book, or perhaps a related book on Dominican spirituality? Chime in in the comments! How can Dominican spirituality be applied generally to all of us in the pews on Sunday mornings?

Do check back in tomorrow for the saint spotlight feature that I put out monthly, The Church Triumphant. And next month, Catholic Book Club looks at a new book on devotion to the Sacred Heart, with Sacred Fire: Practicing Devotion to the Heart of Jesus, by Philip Michael Bulman.

Your child feels called to the religious life - are you smiling or tearing up? Perhaps both :)

I'm being a bit tongue in cheek with the title of this post, because I think everyone who reads this blog knows how lovingly I speak of the religious life. I considered it for myself, and although that was not my vocation, I retain a HUGE soft spot for religious men and women, and monastic living. I read tons of books about it, and find the experience so very sublime.

I have in the past fielded the question of how I would feel should Henry want to be a priest. I have always answered, without hesitation, that I would be thrilled. Depending upon who is asking the question, I have received a variety of responses. :0 Some Catholics nod with understanding and agree that they try to foster an openness to a religious vocation in their children. Others may be sympathetic to the way I feel, but don't necessarily share the sentiment. A few people of various religious persuasions have said to me:

"But...no you wouldn't! Don't you want grandchildren?"

I think Catholic religious vocations seem a bit odd to Christians who do not have celibate clergy, and the nun thing seems downright mysterious. It's different from the way many Christians do things, Anglicans and Orthodox being the exceptions that come immediately to mind (though they do have married clergy, but also religious orders). And this is a fascinating sub-topic, but I'm losing my train of thought as is so often the case. :0

This response has made me think about my answer, although my answer has not changed. Sure, I would love grandchildren someday. However, there is no guarantee, regardless of what vocation they enter into, that my children can and/or will provide them. Life doesn't always work out the way we plan, no? There are lots of couples who would LOVE to have children but are not able to. So my child entering religious life isn't the only reason that they may not have children of their own. The important thing is to discern ones' vocation carefully and to do what God is calling you to do. If my children do that, I will be one happy mother.

But over the weekend, this topic came into my heart anew. A friend from social media, Mike Gannon, announced that he is joining the Carmelites. This wasn't exactly a huge surprise, I could see it brewing for well over a year now. I got home from dance class, saw his Facebook and Twitter posts about it, then went and read his blog post (linked above):

"OH! OH, this is VERY NICE, but..."

*SNIFFLE!*

Mike found me shortly thereafter, wiping my nose as I stared despondently at my phone.

"What's wrong?"

"Mike Gannon is going to become a Carmelite friar. It's GOOD! It's just...I will miss him so much on Twitter!!!"

Because you see, the religious vocations of others are all about ME and my social media experience. :0

I realized that my happy go lucky response about my son and the priesthood was based upon him deciding to become a *diocesan* priest. This is quite different from joining a religious order, where a person is obliged to their community. For both men and women, becoming a member of a religious community means that you must follow the structure and rules of your order and your superior. For cloistered nuns, and also monks, this new lifestyle is quite dramatic. It's not like a man studying for the diocesan priesthood who still has the freedom to go about daily tasks as he pleases in many ways.

I did think about this last year when someone else I followed on Twitter (and a good friend of Mike Gannon's), Channing Dale, entered a cloistered Carmelite community. I didn't even know her, but yet I very strongly felt her absence in my Twitter timeline. And although thrilled for her and for the Church, I felt a bit sad when she left. (I remember saying to my knitting friends: "Her last day on Twitter is coming up. I can't even imagine how she'll feel right after she deactivates her account. And, AND! WE WON'T KNOW, WILL WE, BECAUSE SHE CAN'T TWEET!! *sob*) And the same thing is happening with Mike Gannon, though more strongly because I "know" him better (we've never met in real life). He's a staple in my online Catholic community, and I always enjoy his contributions on Catholic life and issues. I will miss him. :(

Mike will hopefully be back on social media at some point beyond his postulancy, but it is a bit of an unknown. Channing (now Sr. Mary Magdalene of the Divine Heart) will not be back due to the specific nature of her cloistered vocation, and this made me think very deeply about something inherent in the religious life, and indeed in a vocation to marriage as well: there is a dying to self involved. It is more dramatic for cloistered religious than it is for others, but there it is. And for people who know and care for a person entering a cloistered community, there is a sense of loss there, I think. I understand that the gain is SO much greater, for everyone involved. But in our humanness, I still think that this is difficult. In terms of your daily interactions with the person, it may feel a bit like they have died. Poof! They are just gone, and you cannot simply call them to hear their voice. That is terribly hard.

For a parent, I imagine that this would be *incredibly* challenging. I'm not saying that I would begrudge my son or daughter a religious vocation, certainly not, but there are things that I would struggle with. Particularly if it were Anne entering a cloistered monastery. I would get over it, and I would be so very joyful about my child offering their life to Jesus, but I would grieve a little bit for their company, I think.

Just keeping it real here, as I always strive to do. :) I would still be thrilled if Henry or Anne felt called to the religious life, whether it be to a cloistered or active community, or for Henry to the diocesan priesthood. But there is an element of emotional pain that I think would be very real as a parent adjusting to this change.

Thoughts? :)